


to leave me so easy (am i gonna be alright)

by jcp_sob_rjl_lmep



Series: die from a broken heart [1]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: All of the above characters have speaking roles, Character identified in end notes, F/M, Multi, Proceed with caution, Victim Mentality, Violence, beating up Jimmy again, but not tagged because spoilers, mentions of Ambassador Spock and Sybok, mentions of a messed up childhood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 06:17:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18360326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jcp_sob_rjl_lmep/pseuds/jcp_sob_rjl_lmep
Summary: Jim takes a deep breath and turns around, but freezes at the sight of the woman before him, and has no time to raise a defense before she's upon him, shrieking and gouging at his face with her nails. He tries to grab at her wrists, but the blood's already flowing into his eyes, and he doesn't want to hurt her.





	to leave me so easy (am i gonna be alright)

Jim sips his champagne, slowly zoning out as the ambassadors talk to one another. The month-old bond to his husbands pulses with warmth, telling Jim that they're both content, at the very least, if not exactly happy to be spending one of their leave days at this function being thrown by Spock's parents at the Vulcan Embassy. But Spock's mother had asked, and they had agreed, so here the three of them are, schmoozing with the best of them and counting down the minutes until they can all be in bed together again.

 

"-ptain Kirk. Captain Kirk!" Jim comes back to the call of his name, feeling blood rush to his face and ears.

"My apologies, Ambassador. Where were we?" Jim says smoothly, pasting on a smile. Ambassador Johnson chuckles, patting Jim on the shoulder.

"Go on, son. Go and find your boys, stop hanging around with old men like us." His husband, the other Ambassador Johnson, begins to complain with a grin on his face, pulling the group into another round of stories as Jim slips away.

He follows the tug of the bond in the direction of his husbands (they aren't standing together, but he can tell they're at least in the same general area) but finds himself tugged into another group. Several minutes pass before Jim settles the Tellarite ambassadors, and when he finally gets away from that group, a commotion begins behind him.

He ignores it selfishly, walking faster to where his husbands are, but again doesn't make it far-this time because something hits him solidly in the back.

Jim takes a deep breath and turns around, but freezes at the sight of the woman before him, and has no time to raise a defense before she's upon him, shrieking and gouging at his face with her nails. He tries to grab at her wrists, but the blood's already flowing into his eyes, and he doesn't want to hurt her.

"Stop," He croaks weakly, his voice closer to a little boy than a grown man. "Stop, stop, it's okay, please stop."

She easily drowns him out, screaming, "Give him back to me! You took him, give him back, you demon, give him back!"

But then there are other people there, pulling her off, leaving him to collapse to the ground if not for the hand grabbing his arm.

"James," Sarek's voice has never been more welcomed than in that moment, the only thing keeping Jim off the ground and away from the panic attack fast encroaching.

"Dad," Jim nearly sobs, and suddenly Sarek is picking him up, holding him like a child, carrying him out of the room that's abrubtly too loud in the wake of his attack. "Don't let them hurt her, she has to be okay, I have to make sure she's okay,"

Sarek easily stops his attempts to leave the secure hold, however, and Jim still can't see because of the blood still pouring down his face.

"Ambassador Spock and Sybok went with the guards that took her into custody," Sarek says once Jim stops struggling and lays limp in his arms, gasping around tears that want to escape but aren't forming in his eyes. "She will come to no harm as long as she complies with security. Amanda and your husbands will meet us in my office, where I am taking you now."

Jim purposefully zones out this time, and doesn't come back to himself until he's sitting somewhere soft, nearly on Spock's lap, Bones keeping up a steady soothing monologue with the tricorder beeping under his words.

"Hey, Jimmy," Bones breaks off, still speaking softly. Jim hums once, feeling as if he opens his mouth he's going to scream. Another conversation breaks off, and that's Sarek and Amanda, on the other side of the room.

"Charges are being pressed-" Spock starts, his chest rumbling into Jim's back.

"No," Jim immediately panics again. "No, I have to look out for her, it's my fault she did that, no charges, myfaultmyfaultmyfault,"

Bones and Spock intercept a hand each before Jim can tug at his hair, knowing from experience that he'll do it hard enough to bleed if they don't stop him.

"Jimmy," Bones tries. "Jimmy, she attacked you, there were witnesses all over. You didn't provoke her at all."

"It's my fault!" Jim screams. His voice gentles back down to a near-whimper as he continues. "I took him from her, I took his eyes and his hair, I was supposed to look after her, I'm the devil, I'm a demon, _I took him from her_."

"Jim," Amanda this time, "Who is she?"

Bones is gently wiping the blood from his face, carefully clearing it from his eyelashes so he can open his eyes again. Jim doesn't, though, for a second thinking of scraping at his forehead himself so that the blood means he doesn't have to look at anyone.

Spock tenses beside him, and Jim has a moment to remember that his husband is a touch telepath before he's fully hauled into Spock's lap, held tenderly but definitely in a way that he won't be able to move very far.

"Mama," Jim gasps, still gripping his husbands' hands so hard a distant part of him is vaguely surprised there's no broken fingers. " _Mama_."

And there are the tears, hot and wet, sliding from his closed eyes and hitting Spock's neck, smoothing down to wet the neckline of his Vulcan robes.

The bond swells with emotion-horror, disgust, sadness, an overwhelming love-and with a pinch at his neck, Jim finally slides fully into the darkness.

**Author's Note:**

> Oof. This was one that grabbed me and wouldn't let me go.  
> I wasn't sure if this was enough to be counted as major violence, but if it is, let me know and I'll change that tag.  
> Obviously Winona had some kind of mental break, I didn't fully explore it in this one, but basically every time she sees Jim she kind of has a screaming breakdown and tries to attack him. Jim, being Jim and also just being trained like that through childhood, is in the mentality that it's his fault and that if he was better she would be okay.  
> I would be open to continuing this, but I would need some plot bunnies. If you want a continuation, put down a prompt/direction for me to go in and also if you would rather another chapter or just a new work in a series instead.  
> I have decided to continue this, at least one little sequel, but I've made it a series so make sure to subscribe to that instead if you want to keep on with this.  
> Tumblr's iwillstaywiththemforever.  
> Title's from 'Die From A Broken Heart' by Maddie and Tae, because I love that song but it always gives me vibes like they're singing it to their mamas but their mamas can't/won't respond. It just makes me very sad.  
> Later guys.


End file.
